Becoming the Man of the Calling by Bryan Craig
One day, when Moses had grown up, he went out to his people and looked on their burdens, and he saw an Egyptian beating a Hebrew, one of his people. He looked this way and that, and seeing no one, he struck down the Egyptian and hid him in the sand. When he went out the next day, behold, two Hebrews were struggling together. And he said to the man in the wrong, “Why do you strike your companion?” He answered, “Who made you a prince and a judge over us? Do you mean to kill me as you killed the Egyptian?” Then Moses was afraid, and thought, “Surely the thing is known.” 15 When Pharaoh heard of it, he sought to kill Moses. But Moses fled from Pharaoh and stayed in the land of Midian. And he sat down by a well. Exodus 2:11-15 ESV
The other day, I was reading an Oswald Chambers devotional from “My Utmost for His Highest,” one which I had read many times before but it struck me in a personal way. Oswald talks about how Moses was definitely called to deliver His people from bondage, but in the beginning, he tried to do things his own way, in his fleshly power, which turned into sin and a 40 year delay in fulfilling God’s calling.
Nearly 40 years ago, I was sitting in my fraternity living room, attending a Bible study. This was unusual for me. I was a Christian, but I never read my Bible, rarely went to church and never went to Bible studies. The fact that I even went to this Bible study is evidence to me that the Holy Spirit was with me, even though I mostly ignored Him. One of my fraternity members had a brother from Arkansas, who was an evangelist. He came to lead us in a Bible study. I sat there, with about 20 or 30 other young men, feeling a bit out of place. As the young evangelist started talking, I admired him and his courage to bring the gospel to a group of heathens like us.
This was spring of my Junior year in college and my mind started daydreaming about my life. I found myself thinking, “Maybe I could be a minister. I like helping people and I don’t mind speaking in front of people.” That was about the extent of it, when the young evangelist got a strange look on his face. He stopped the Bible study and said, “Guys, this has never happened to me before, but I need to tell you that God is telling me He is calling 2 men in this room into the ministry, and I need to pause and pray.” My heart started racing, and I was in disbelief. I was thinking about going into ministry at the exact time he said these words. After the prayer, he said, “Would you come up and talk to me if you think I was talking about you, so I can get some confirmation to this word from God?”
I don’t remember another word he said during the study. My mind was going crazy with thoughts like, “I can’t leave OSU and go to seminary. What would my parents say about this? I’m no minister. Just look at my life.” After the study was over, I ran like Jonah ran from his calling to the Ninevites. However, when I came back an hour later, he was still there. So, I decided to tell him what happened. Tears started flowing, as I confessed my sins to the man and told him that I was certainly not ministry material.
He was kind and gentle, and he prayed for me. I remember him saying, “I don’t know Bryan. I’m just the messenger here. But I will tell you that I’ve known some men who were called to ministry and didn’t pursue it, and they had really miserable lives.” Ugh.
After a few days of restlessness, I dismissed this experience and chalked it up to my imagination. Four and a half years later, it was Thanksgiving morning, early, and I awoke to a strong remembrance of that night in the fraternity house. It was so strong I got up and went to my desk to dig for my old Bible. I was now married and living in Tulsa. I found the man’s card tucked in my Bible with some verses written on the back. I fumbled through the verses, seeking answers. Nothing came. I had gotten a job as a salesman in Dallas the previous three years and now worked for my father-in-law in a small industrial supply business. I was still the furthest thing from a minister. I wrote the man a letter (this was the days before email) and told him where I was and how I still was not in ministry. I stuck a $20 bill in it as a donation and mailed it off.
The holidays came and went, and no word back. Finally I got a letter, and I tore it open with anticipation. He told me that he had moved and so my letter should have never reached him. However, the Postmaster General knew him and forwarded my letter to him. He said he received my letter the same week that he ran into the other young man who had felt like he was called into ministry on that same fateful night. Remember, God told him 2 young men were being called. Amazing!
As for me, he just told me that it seemed like I had a ministry opportunity to be a light right where I was in my small business. He told me to “bloom where I was planted” and he quoted 1 Thessalonians 5:24, “The one who calls you is faithful; He will surely do it.” The idea I took was that if I was to be in ministry, God would make it happen. Again, I didn’t do much about this calling, but it was always in the back of my mind.
I won’t go into my full testimony, but I will tell you that God grabbed my heart after Missy and I had our first baby, Natalie, and then, He used a Promise Keepers conference to help me see that I needed to be the spiritual leader of my family. He started prompting me to read His Word and pray, and I started getting involved in the men’s ministry in my church. After 10 years, I found Influencers and discovered an amazing tool which met a need I’d discovered… a way to make disciples. After a few years of leading Journey groups and being a volunteer leader for Influencers in Tulsa, I was alone in my attic, doing some cleaning out while my family was away, as I discovered a box with my personal memorabilia. I pulled out my old Bible and foundthe letter from the young evangelist. To me, it was like the scene in the first Superman movie, as Clark Kent finds the green crystal in the barn and realizes his calling. All of the sudden, it dawned on me that Influencers was the ministry to which I was called. And for dramatic effect, I was shuffling some instrumental music while I worked and the Superman movie theme started playing. Seriously!
It was a profound moment between me and the Lord. But I will tell you that I was much like Moses, still thinking I could pursue my calling on my terms. For example, I wanted to be a millionaire before I went into full-time ministry. I was afraid of not having enough to take care of my wife and four daughters and all the needs that we had. So, God had to take me into the wilderness with many challenges, financial and otherwise, to break me.
Finally, 10 years ago, 30 years after the fraternity Bible study night, I surrendered to this callingto ministry. As I counted the cost and contemplated this calling, I asked God about all the trials I had to endure, and I read Hebrews 12 about how God must discipline His sons. God spoke a word to me in that private moment… “Crucible”. I thought I knew what a crucible was…like a cross we must bear. But when I looked it up on Google, I saw a glowing red hot container. It said a Crucible is a container that can withstand extreme heat that will melt or alter its contents. God gently spoke to my heart as he said, “Bryan, you are a Crucible, and I’ve allowed all this heat into your life to melt your heart and prepare you for ministry.” I finally understood. This was my Personal Abandonment and Absolute Trust moment, as I got on my knees and gave him my life, my whole life, everything, my dreams, my expectations, my fears, my gifts.
Looking back, I’m so thankful. I count it a privilege to be called into His service, and I have discovered that His ways are SO much better than mine. It’s taken nearly 40 years to make me the man of the calling, and I feel I have so far to go. But I encourage you as you read this. God is calling you to something. He’s always got a plan. Surrender to Him, let Him do what He wants to do, in His timing, for “God is faithful, and He will surely do it.”