Influencers Weekly Devotional

Abide with ME

The Blessing of Being Last Scripture: "But many who [now] are first will be last [then], and many who [now] are last will be first [then]." Matthew 19:30 - Amplified Bible

Several years ago, I experienced firsthand a personal application of the above referenced scripture, and as with many other "learning experiences" the Lord has exposed me to in my life, I didn't like it at all. In fact, I was ticked. Now understand, this experience wasn't earth shaking or even inconvenient to me. It didn't hurt any of my loved ones or myself. It didn't cost me anything, except for some pride that needed removing. What did come from this experience started a change in my life that helped me understand that a blessing can be found in being last, if I am willing to look at the experience through God's perspective. Maybe this insight will help a reader see what he may be experiencing by having a new perspective. Be encouraged when I repeat what I said, "There is a blessing to be found in being last, if you will look for it." Before I connect my intro with finding the blessing, allow me to give you some background information: When I grew into adulthood, I took with me a few flaws in my thinking. It happens to a lot of men who feel they must prove something to someone, or maybe even to themselves. It is likely wounds of the past, or impoverishment, or being shamed by peers that creates the condition and produces a wounded man who, in turn, wounds others. It could be a multitude of things that make him feel he needs to push to the front for recognition and win at all costs. For this man, there is a strong desire for the applause of man, and self-condemnation when a mistake is made. The life of this guy is fertile ground for the Accuser to distract and discourage. This man can adopt a perspective whereby he must be in charge of his success and be "top gun" in everything, or else, he becomes a loser. Of course, this man has reinforcement for his flawed perspective from everything the world represents. As an example, have you ever heard of a movie called "Low Gun" instead of Top Gun, or a motivational speaker title his book, "Success by Being Last" instead of "Success by Intimidation?" Of course you have not, for it would have no appeal to an audience. However, there was a great teacher Who taught a different way of achieving success. He doesn't get much press by the world's way of thinking, even though He is the Author of Life. With me, there were many years that I bought into the world system and lived by the perspective that I needed to be first and declared winner in all my endeavors. I wanted this recognition, and I needed this recognition. However, I didn't always get it, and when I did not, the Accuser would do his thing, which was to convince me that I was a loser. God helped me break out of this perceived need in my life, by making me last. This is where my story begins. Several years ago, I was playing a golf tournament at a Christian men's conference. It was supposed to be a "hit and giggle" thing. But there is no such thing as that for a guy who takes his golf as serious as I did back then. No, it required that I win it, or do what I could to make it happen. It was a four ball tournament, and I was put with a group of men who were just slightly less motivated than me to win and be recognized. Like me, they really worked on their game. As a group competing with the other groups, we knew we had a good chance of winning the tournament, for there were some guys who had never picked up a club. On the golf course, these beginners were hitting humiliating shots, except they didn't seem to mind. At the time, I couldn't understand this way of thinking. If it had been me hitting those shots, I would have been throwing a golf club or looking for someone to throw in the pond. As was expected, my group and I won the tournament. After dinner that night, the awards were presented. Undoubtedly, the tournament had some great sponsors, for the prizes were way out there. My team was drooling over what we would get as a prize for coming in first. However, when it came to getting our prize, the devilish golf committee who ran the tournament decided to apply the principle that the last will be first in getting a prize, and this is where I got ticked. This meant that every team who finished behind us would walk to the tables first and pick any prize they wanted, starting with the men who shot a round of 200. When my group and I finally got to the table, all the great prizes were picked over. I was even the last guy on my team to the table of prizes, or should I say, "prize." When I finally got to the table to get my reward for finishing first, (or was it last?), the only thing left on the table was a book. It was a book that no one, including myself, had ever heard of. Most guys don't read anyway, especially a book two inches thick. So, they left it for the guy who came last, which was me. I smiled and took the book. I could still be some kind of winner out of this I thought, by looking like a Christian servant even though I wanted to strangle the golf committee. You know when people know you're faking happiness over anger? They won't make eye contact with you. When I returned to my table with book in hand, this was the case. Nobody would look me in the eye. It was best that they didn't. Later in the evening, a friend came up to me and asked me if I knew about the book in my hand. I kinda suspected he might have been the inspiration for the first shall be last fiasco. Still smiling my "servant leader" fake smile, I answered him that I had not, while thinking in my mind, "You mean the book I'm looking for a trash can to deposit it in?" He said, "It is a new book by Eugene Peterson. He wrote it so Christians could understand how to read scripture in modern day language. It's called The Message." That day in 1993 was the first time I heard of this book and put my hand on The Message. It was not the last time, as this interpretation of scripture has blessed me many times over the last 18 years when I've read from it. The greatest blessing that came to me from this experience was beginning to understand how a blessing from God can surface from the experience of being last, rather than first. It has taught me to not fear being last, for being last has nothing to do with being a winner or loser. It has nothing to do with self-worth or needing to be recognized or to be appreciated by God. In fact, it has given me freedom from my own need of approval to help someone who needs to be encouraged, by putting them ahead of myself and really serving them as Christ does. I didn't think so at the time, but those duffers who shot 200 were also used by God to teach me that even though they were last in man's way of thinking, they were first in God's economy. They were last in deserving a prize, but they were first to get the best ones, which is the way God generally does things with His grace. Based on the golf score, I was first in deserving the best prize, and most men, including myself at the time, would think I was cheated. At first, I thought I was cheated and got the worst prize. Since then, I have come to understand I was given the best prize on the table. I was given a book that helped me understand what was missing in the practical application of scripture to my life. But I was also given a gift found in simply being last. The prize found from this position has helped me come to understand how God blesses the humble man, and there is no prize this world can give me that could come remotely close to the blessings God bestows on a humble man in whom He delights. In God's economy, being last is the path to His heart, and that place is the best of all Treasures. So, do not fear being last. It will lead to the greater blessing. Rocky Fleming